Don't you sometimes get the urge to watch a bad anime? I know I do. When last that urge hit me, the bad anime that fell on my radar was Guilty Crown, a series I had previously begun but then dropped for quite possibly being the most mediocre thing in the history of the entire universe.
I prepositioned a friend that we watch the series together and nitpick the hell out of it. That friend had in fact already seen the series, and this was his approximate reaction to watching it a second time:
You don't want to know what I had to agree to to get him to watch it again, but eventually, he agreed.
This is a tale of unmatched heroism and unbelievable moral decrepitude - a tale plumbing the depths of the human soul and testing the very limits of sanity. It's a tale filled with joyous laughter and tears of suffering. It's a tale of determination in the face of great adversity.
It's the (mostly unedited) tale... of sitting through Guilty Crown.
Episode 1
(10:46:48 PM) BornIn1142:
Maybe this is kind of a petty complaint, but that was a really long
establishing shot.
(10:47:19 PM) BornIn1142:
Two things:
1. That's a pretty nice song.
2. I have no idea what this
music video is about.
(10:47:27 PM) Zach: I still
don't
(10:47:59 PM) BornIn1142: By
the way, I really loathe this outfit.
(10:48:28 PM) BornIn1142: It
would be ridiculous and ugly any day of the week, but the fact that
she's supposed to be on some kind of covert mission just makes it...
wow.
(10:49:41 PM) BornIn1142:
These mecha designs are butt-ugly too. I don't like them.
(10:49:47 PM) Zach: Nobody
does
(10:51:07 PM) BornIn1142:
Poor Elevens.
(10:51:15 PM) Zach: SHHH,
wrong series
(10:52:43 PM) BornIn1142: If
you take Japan's xenophobia into account, the subtext here is just
horrifying...
(10:52:53 PM) BornIn1142:
Foreign aid = bad. Outside world = bad.
(10:52:55 PM) Zach: Yep,
same with CG
(10:53:34 PM) BornIn1142:
Note the lyrics?
(10:53:49 PM) BornIn1142:
This series is going to explore deep territory like "Why do
people fight and hurt each other?"
(10:53:59 PM) Zach: Of
course
(10:55:02 PM) BornIn1142:
Black Butler used the song better.
(10:55:32 PM) BornIn1142:
Wait, Ouma Shu?
(10:55:41 PM) BornIn1142:
Ouma... Shu... Omashu o_O
(10:55:49 PM) Zach:
Mysterious girl as soldiers burst in
(10:55:53 PM) Zach: Never
saw THIS before
(10:56:04 PM) BornIn1142: I
am not impressed by her "quirkiness."
(10:56:14 PM) BornIn1142: I
like the music there.
10:56:36 PM) BornIn1142: Do
you feel bad for her yet? Do you? DO YOU?
(10:58:33 PM) Zach: Of
course
(10:59:01 PM) BornIn1142: I
still think this whole scenario is stupid. His self-hatred is based
on the completely normal response of not fighting back against a
squad of armed soldiers.
(10:59:06 PM) BornIn1142:
Whoop-de-fricking-doo.
(10:59:23 PM) Zach: Eh, self
hate isn't rational
(11:00:02 PM) BornIn1142:
Yes, but this is used to paint him as objectively unworthy.
(11:00:19 PM) BornIn1142:
Careful!
(11:00:23 PM) BornIn1142:
That's a black guy!
(11:00:29 PM) Zach: from
JAPAN
(11:01:22 PM) BornIn1142:
Gai enters with his theme song blaring.
(11:01:29 PM) Zach: Can't
complain
(11:02:16 PM) BornIn1142:
Whew, thank god this Aryan superman was here to get rid of the
dark-skinned rabble.
(11:04:11 PM) BornIn1142:
Excuse me while I roll my eyes at the sensual writing in pain.
(11:04:21 PM) Zach: Hehe
(11:04:29 PM) BornIn1142:
Holy shit, this broad is dumb.
(11:05:00 PM) BornIn1142:
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHH
(11:05:27 PM) Zach: Please
USE ME!
(11:05:47 PM) BornIn1142:
That looked a lot like Anemone there.
(11:06:41 PM) BornIn1142:
That's a nice tune.
(11:07:57 PM) BornIn1142:
Also, the ending song is nice.
Episode 2
(11:10:47 PM) BornIn1142: I like the opening song too.
(11:11:29 PM) Zach: Everyone
does
(11:12:07 PM) BornIn1142:
Tsugumi's design is very hateable.
(11:13:24 PM) BornIn1142: I
can't tell if this power looks cool or stupid.
(11:13:58 PM) BornIn1142:
*butt-poke*
(11:14:03 PM) BornIn1142:
This series is trying to piss me off.
(11:14:17 PM) BornIn1142:
More sensual writhing.
(11:17:04 PM) BornIn1142:
Sometimes, less is more,
(11:18:18 PM) BornIn1142:
Hey, dumbass, you could just have gotten the cylinder off him when
you met him!
(11:20:14 PM) BornIn1142:
"The Kaleidoscope" is literally the stupidest nickname in
history.
(11:21:22 PM) Zach:
'Mangekyo' sounds better I guess
(11:22:25 PM) BornIn1142:
This is a bit over the top, isn't it?
(11:22:47 PM) Zach: No lie
(11:23:47 PM) BornIn1142: I
wonder if they ever explain the name "Undertaker." That
should be good...
(11:25:01 PM) BornIn1142:
Man, that Humvee has good handling.
(11:26:50 PM) BornIn1142: I
am less than satisfied by this explanation.
(11:27:39 PM) BornIn1142:
Why the fuck do her boobs need to be in this scene?
(11:29:26 PM) Zach: And the
song agian
(11:29:35 PM) BornIn1142:
Different version though.
(11:29:49 PM) BornIn1142:
Appropriately more optimistic-sounding.
(11:30:59 PM) BornIn1142:
Who could have seen this coming?
(11:31:36 PM) Zach: and so
ends another episode
Episode 3
(11:35:51 PM) BornIn1142: I
actually think the "It's the real thing" was a great line
to end an episode on.
(11:38:29 PM) BornIn1142:
Wait.
(11:38:33 PM) BornIn1142:
Shu's in Genshiken?
(11:38:51 PM) Zach: And
herewe- he is?
(11:39:03 PM) BornIn1142:
Society for Contemporary Visual Culture.
(11:39:14 PM) BornIn1142:
Isn't that also what Genshiken is called?
(11:39:34 PM) BornIn1142:
Also, this is about the point where I stopped watching the first time
around.
(11:40:17 PM) BornIn1142:
Really? Seriously?
(11:40:47 PM) Zach:
SERIOUSLY
(11:41:13 PM) BornIn1142:
Inori is genuinely the worst attempt at making a character "striking"
that I've ever seen,
(11:42:58 PM) BornIn1142:
She's just completely unashamed waifu-bait.
(11:43:31 PM) Zach: No lie
(11:43:41 PM) BornIn1142: I
want this guy to turn evil.
(11:43:55 PM) BornIn1142: He
has a sinister air about him.
(11:44:08 PM) Zach: What
gave you that idea?
(11:44:22 PM) BornIn1142:
Iunno.
(11:45:05 PM) BornIn1142:
"Someone witnessed us?"
(11:45:14 PM) BornIn1142: I
didn't realize they were trying to keep a low profile...
(11:45:31 PM) BornIn1142:
It's a “genetic drug?” Um, okay.
(11:46:01 PM) Zach: GENETICS
(11:46:54 PM) BornIn1142:
Inori's speaking voice is annoying to me.
(11:47:53 PM) BornIn1142:
KIYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
(11:48:54 PM) BornIn1142: I
cant believe what a half-hearted attempt at making a socially awkward
character this guy is.
(11:50:58 PM) BornIn1142:
Man, it must suck to have a refrigerator reflect the shape of your
heart.
(11:51:05 PM) Zach: You SO
owe me for this rewatch
(11:51:28 PM) BornIn1142:
Heh.
(11:52:50 PM) BornIn1142:
Did I miss something?
(11:52:59 PM) BornIn1142:
What's the significance of "Sugar?"
(11:53:04 PM) Zach: I...heck
if I know
(11:53:49 PM) BornIn1142:
The hell is going on
(11:54:07 PM) Zach: DRAMA
(11:54:20 PM) BornIn1142:
Dr. Ginger soda?
(11:54:56 PM) BornIn1142:
Now it's an instrumental version of that song.
(11:55:49 PM) BornIn1142:
The moral of the story: mercy is for the weak.
(11:56:11 PM) BornIn1142:
Right...
(12:26:52 AM) BornIn1142:
So, what are your thoughts about Guilty Crown so far?
(12:26:56 AM) BornIn1142:
Scintillating, ain't it?
(12:27:03 AM) Zach: It's as
"ho hum" as the first time I saw it
